The were arguing the opposite of what you said if anything. You sure you didn't respond to the wrong comment?

Big scary words are not violence. They can't hurt you. Bombings and invasions that killed people are violence.

I agree, I'm just confused where that fits in this thread.

Actual violence is much more antagonizing than mere hurt feelings.

I wouldn't classify full scale war as "antagonizing," but, if you want to downplay it, be my guest.