Maybe that means you're a net newbie (noobie, noob).

noob = new user

new = I think this might be a mistake? Surely noob should be compared to olds

p-value = a statistical measure of confidence. In academic science a value < 0.05 is considered "statistically significant".

It's from where the comment is sourced.

/noobcomments vs /newcomments. New is new as in recent.

it's in the original article. New comments are any new comment from any account. Noob comments are new comments from new accounts