OP's blog post also rang false to me. It feels like it was written by someone who works in HR trying to promote a culture that inhibits real interactions, under the guise of being "a good human being."
Being a good human involves honesty and naming things that are extremely difficult to name when you're both employed at the same place. I've had so many honest and illuminating conversations with coworkers after one or both of us left a company or organization, conversations that deepened into real friendships instead of just being colleagues.
Absolutely keep in touch with people because connection is essential to the human existence. Don't "pretend" to offer connection if you aren't willing to nourish it. The pretense is just mean and does more harm than good.
Yeah. There's a sort of uncanny valley to this that's hard to explain but you know when you see it.
It's like, conversations naturally taper yes, sensitive topics are danced around yes, particularly with people you're not that close with, but there's a grey area people play with generously in genuine interactions, precisely because they actually care.
Conversely in some interactions where you're sort of made acutely aware you've gone 'off script' the moment it happens and you realise, oh, this was always just templated/transactional.
I just think it's generally bad advice to enter into such interactions knowingly, even if you have good intentions, because of this. It's quite likely to happen and it's just an overall negative experience.
It's kinda hard to write an example or template for a communication pattern that seems really personal and genuine. OP is describing a pattern and is explicit that it's both a) a good thing to do on an emotional and ethical level and b) that the industry is small and it's good to not burn bridges.
I think it's clear from context that you can make the actual message a lot more personal based on your relationship with that person, but it seems harsh to say 'this looks like an HR template' when the post is kinda explicitly trying to make a general point.
>Don’t trash your employer, nor respond if they do. If they start that, say “I’m sorry, I can imagine why you’d feel that way, but I can’t continue this conversation.”. Note I’ve never had someone do this.
Are you kidding? Treat someone like a human but the moment they express emotion, explicitly denounce the thread and hang up?
Yeah, not sure what the author was thinking there. Definitely not 'reaffirming of both your and their humanity'.
I mean, I get that it's supposed to be just a general pointer or something, but that phrase is word for word what an LLM would say when it's self censoring... Or something lifted out of an episode of Severance.
Being a good human involves honesty and naming things that are extremely difficult to name when you're both employed at the same place. I've had so many honest and illuminating conversations with coworkers after one or both of us left a company or organization, conversations that deepened into real friendships instead of just being colleagues.