My friends have potlucks at at public parks/beaches. For me I often gather at the local hackerspace which is a collective that I’m a member of. I’m joining another collective that’s a tiny farm and they have potlucks. Theres “bike party” where a bunch of rowdy people meet in the streets, ride bikes for 5 miles or so with music blaring out of special speaker filled bike trailers and we take over both lanes of traffic until we ride to a selected location to throw a dance party.
And I don’t have a spare bedroom. Also most of my friend group doesn’t drink.
No offering your spare bedroom when someone drinks too much, no communal potlucks, no gatherings when businesses are closed...
Where you invest your resources speaks volumes about your priorities in life.