This was a great article. I've been doing this for quite a while now, coincidentally. I just noticed that I can get my needs met if I open myself up (I feel lonely all the time). I actually got the feedback quite a lot from a bunch of people/new friends that myself opening up very soon is what drew them and immediately lifted the relationship past the awkward acquaintance-phase, they really dig that. They've been more open as well.
The comments have great advice as well, my key take-aways:
- more female friends as a dude (on that, sometimes takes a bit of work if you're interested in each other beforehand, that's where I'm at right now. a break of two weeks should work magic)
- be more initiative, be a friend to other people
- show up and stay connected, even if it's not 50:50, which is unlikely anyway
I have social anxiety/depression and have lived most of my life in the basement (literally and figuratively). But since last year or so I'm very extraverted. Not sure how this works, but it does and it's awesome. I just chat to random people (being German!).
The only thing I'm still struggling with is friends who behaved in a way that I didn't like. Instead of talking about it I withdraw from the relationship. But one step after another.
The comments have great advice as well, my key take-aways:
- more female friends as a dude (on that, sometimes takes a bit of work if you're interested in each other beforehand, that's where I'm at right now. a break of two weeks should work magic) - be more initiative, be a friend to other people - show up and stay connected, even if it's not 50:50, which is unlikely anyway
I have social anxiety/depression and have lived most of my life in the basement (literally and figuratively). But since last year or so I'm very extraverted. Not sure how this works, but it does and it's awesome. I just chat to random people (being German!).
The only thing I'm still struggling with is friends who behaved in a way that I didn't like. Instead of talking about it I withdraw from the relationship. But one step after another.